"A sweet and obedient child will enroll a father or mother only in Parenting 101. If you are blessed with a child who tests your patience to the nth degree, you will be enrolled in Parenting 505. Rather than wonder what you might have done wrong in the premortal life to be so deserving, you might consider the more challenging child a blessing and opportunity to become more godlike yourself. With which child will your patience, long-suffering, and other Christlike virtues most likely be tested, developed, and refined? Could it be possible that you need this child as much as this child needs you?" -Elder Lynn G. Robbins (of the seventy)
When Rocco was born I was enrolled in Parenting 101, although sometimes (being a first-time parent) I thought I was in 505. When Zeegan was born I learned the difference between 101 and 505. She takes so much more time and energy to keep her happy and nice. I often feel like I'm not giving Rocco the attention he deserves because i'm having to spend it all up on Zeegan.
I have NEVER wondered what I did "wrong" in the pre-mortal life (although I'm quite certain the list is probably long and detailed...) to be so deserving of such a challenging child, because it's fact that I need her as much, if not more than, she needs me.
Zeegan is my little angel, even though usually she's a bit of a holy terror. I've never been so completely and utterly exhausted in my entire life as I have been since ZZ was born. She pushes me to the very edge of all my limits daily. It's a battle to try and teach her anything. It's a battle to get her to be nice to her brother. It's a battle to convince her to do anything she does not feel like doing at that moment. There's that saying "You may be wining the Battle, but I will win the War". Sometimes I feel like she is not only winning the battles, but she is winning the war as well. Then I realize, the war is not between she and me, the war is between us and the Devil. and the Devil is winning if I think of this time with my daughter as a battleground. So how does one teach a little girl with such a strong will and spirit to be nice?, to be caring?, to be Christlike?
I suppose the best way is through patience and long-suffering. The very best way is through setting a good example and through just loving her no matter what.
I haven't been feeling well lately and on top of that I've been working really hard to get our house turned into a home. So, Between the two, I don't think I've left myself much energy to put into being a great mom (not that I've been a bad mom, but I haven't been going out of my way to make sure everyday is a fun creative and time-well-spent day. She's been watching a lot of movies actually...). Zeegan was fully potty trained with no accidents happening by mid-August, but since we came to the new house she will only go stinky in the toilet but keeps urinating all over our new floors. Today we had to get out of the house for awhile because I had errands to run and also because Seth was sleeping (he's been working the night shift again lately) and I didn't want her to wake him. So, today has been a bit of a rough day for Zeegan and me. Then tonight after I got the kids to bed, I came online and started reading a couple friends blogs. And two of my friends posts were about being or becoming a GREAT mom, not just a good mom, but a really GREAT mom (awesome timing right?!). I needed their reminders tonight to put me back on track.
In the spirit of begin grateful to be in Parenting 505, let me tell you some of the things I adore about my little princess:
-Zeegan loves me. She really does. She tells me so a thousand times a day (usually right after doing something really bad, but who cares!)
-Zeegan is funny and she loves to laugh. She spends a lot of time making herself laugh and a lot of time making her brother laugh. And hearing her really goofy non-sensical jokes always makes Seth and me laugh.
-ZeeZee is a princess. She tells everyone that. If you ask her how come she's so pretty, she'll respond "It's because I'm a princess". She spends hours dressing herself up as princess and making me spin her around the house dancing. She knows the songs for each princess and if she's feeling particularly happy she will sing them for you upon request.
-Zeegan is a little diva. and it's adorable! It doesn't matter how cute I dress her up, it's never enough. she needs her glasses, or her bracelets or necklace or her purse. She doesn't' want her sandals she wants her princess heels. She needs some makeup on. It's the wrong bow... She's very particular about what she will and won't wear, and it's adorable! I hope she's this set on always being modest when she gets older. Because once she puts her mind to the ensemble she wants to wear, all heck will break out if that doesn't happen.
- Zeegan is a smart little girl. She knows all her letters and the sounds that about half of them make. She can count to twelve and knows numbers 1,2,3,4,5,7, and 8 by sight.
-ZeeZee fights with Seth. Not a good sign for the future, but right now it's usually pretty great, because they are usually fighting over me. ZeeZee gets upset when Seth is hugging me and usually yells "I'll save you Mommy!" or "Hey! That's my Mommy!". When she yells that i'm her mommy, Seth always says "She's your mommy, but she's my wife." Zeegan doesn't like that so she has started telling me that I'm her "life". hahaha! Now, most times when Seth hugs me, ZZ will yell "No, She's MY life!". I'm glad I'm her life, because she is my life too.
-Zeegan loves to eat. Her favorite foods? Broccoli, Caesar Salad, Strawberries (which she calls "Strawberry cakes), cookies and cream ice cream and pink frosting Donuts. I love that my baby girl loves her veggies so much! and who can blame her for loving donuts and ice cream? they're fantastic!!!
-Zeegan loves dancing! She dances and twills everywhere she goes. She says "Look! I a Bowaweena!" to everyone and then puts her arms above her head and twirls, twirls, twirls...
-Zeegan loves her boys. It's sad, but special. Zeegan cries every single day because she misses Rocco and she really misses Daddy. This is special to me, because sometimes when they're around she leaves me wondering. She can be such a bully to Rocco and never really wants Daddy if I'm in the room. But when they aren't there, she is devastated.
-ZeeZee loves reading. She is her best behaved self when I am reading her a book. She gets excited about them. When we got to the library she'll find a couple books that look fun (usually ones with Princesses on the cover) and then she goes to this little grey stool they have in the corner and will sit on that stool looking at her books for quite a long time. I need to get a little grey stool at our house, but for some reason i don't think it would work magic the way the library one does...
-ZeeZee's obsessed with marriage. She asia about me being married to "Prince Daddy" all the time. She tells me quite regularly that when she gets "olda" she's gonna marry prince superhero Rocco. I've told her a hundred times she can't marry Rocco cuz he's her brother, but she doesn't care what I say. She just loves her brother. :)
-Zeegan loves kissing! Or should I say she loves watching kissing. Weird right? hahaha! At the end of every disney movie she gets SOOOO excited! She yells "Look! they're kissing!" and then stares with a great big smile on her face. She doesn't like it when Seth an I hug (cuz i'm HER life), but she doesn't mind when we kiss.
-Speaking of kissing; Zeegan gets REALLY loving when you feed her something she likes. She takes a bite and then kisses you or says she loves you. If I make a great dinner I hear the words "Mommy I love you!" about a thousand time throughout the meal and I get just as many kisses. I LOVE it! Keeps me striving to make good food always!
Well I could go on for hours about my princess. But what it comes down to is this; I love my little Zeegan Samialaina so much! I am grateful for the opportunity she is giving me to become a better person. I only hope I don't fail. I am grateful she's a 505 child because I can't imagine her any other way. Parenting 505 is hard, it's really hard. But I wouldn't change her for the world. I am gonna try to be a GREAT mom with Zeegan and with my sweet sweet boy Rocco from now on! I am, I will, I can.
